Then I'd be funny and retired and worth $800 million and never have to work a day in my life like Jerry Seinfeld, 59 today...
Or I'd never look my age like fellow OC girl, beautiful Michelle Pfeiffer, 55 today...
Or I'd be super tall and have a funny name like Uma Thurman, 43 today...
Or I'd be uber-rich, and have a movie based on me called "Citizen Love" and I'd build a castle in San Simeon named "Love Castle" like William Randolph Hearst, who would be 150 today....
Or I'd decorate my fireplace mantel with all my awards (Oscars, Golden Globes, BAFTA Masks, SAG Actors, MTV Movie Awards Golden Popcorns, etc.) like Daniel Day Lewis, 55 today...
Or I'd be an ultra-talented jazz musician like Duke Ellington, who would be 114 today...
Or I'd be a super-fast NASCAR race car driver like Dale Earnhardt, who would've been 62 today (he left us too soon)....
Or I'd wear a silly black wig and scream in an annoying voice "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!" like Eve Plumb (aka Jan Brady), 55 today...
Or I'd wear a cool headband and mullet wig until Brooke Shields suggests that I shave my head bald and I'd be the greatest tennis player of all time and retire at 36 like Andre Agassi, 43 today...
Or I'd have a cool surfer dad (wait! I *do* have a cool surfer dad) and have trouble with my weight going up and down (wait! I *do* have that problem) and change my hair from blonde to brunette and back again! (wow! Who knew Carnie and I would be so much alike?!) like Carnie Wilson, 45 today.
But today is *not* my birthday. Oh well...luckily I thought of all you celebs today and could wish YOU a Happy Birthday!
Regards, Mrs Love
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